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Writer's pictureTina Lupiezowiec

What is a coincidence?

When do coincidences stop being coincidences?

A coincidence is the act or condition of coinciding; of two things that happen at the same time by accident but seem to have some connection. We usually think, Wow, that was weird.

That definition works, right?

There is a feeling of strangeness or specialness with that correlation of occurrences, along with a sense that it was truly a one-off occurrence. Believe it or not, most coincidences are not that coincidental, and a lot of things have a higher probability of coinciding than you would think. Despite that, we don't really notice them, because we are consumed with busyness. So it's the NOTICING that interests me when it comes to this discussion.


What do I call coincidences when they are constantly happening?

If you find yourself swept up in a tidal wave of coincidences, you can call them synchronistic events or synchronicities. Apparently, some people call synchronicities serendipitous events or serendipity, but I have never met a person who uses that terminology. I wonder if hearing serendipity being used that way would sound weird to me? Probably, because different nearly always feels weird. I live in Madison, Wisconsin. The woo-woo folks that I hangout with, myself included, use the term synchronicity. When there are loads of synchronicities and we follow them like breadcrumbs, we say we are in the flow.


What is so special about being in the flow?

Here is an EXAMPLE of living in the flow:

(This particular event did not happen, but it could easily happen. Everyone in the flow has many a story like this one. No apples were harmed in the telling of this tale.)


On a whim, after seeing an apple tree while on my morning walk, I get to thinking how cool it would be to have my own apple tree. I contemplate planting one. I return from my walk and immediately hop in the car to drive to the grocery store. In the car, I turn on the radio. First song I hear is the Vancouver Youth Choir singing Apple Tree. I get to the store and the woman who parked next to me has a humongous apple tattooed on her shoulder. I admire her tattoo and marvel that I have no tattoos, outside of my many scars, which I then remind myself are MY tattoos. I wander the store foraging for that which will keep me alive another week. I wander through the toxic fake fragrances in the catch-all aisle and see a packet of candy apple incense sticks precariously hanging kittywampus on their hook. I adjust their positioning. Then I can't help but think about endocrine disruptors and worry about everyones' hormonal imbalances while I head first in the direction of and then into the fruit and vegetable section. I am not craving an apple because I'm thinking about endocrine disruptors; but I definitely have apples on the brain. Then I happen to see that a leg of the table containing all the organic apples appears to be at a dangerous tilt, and is mere seconds away from collapsing. I swiftly find a distracted store employee off flirting with a scantily clad customer and alert them to the imminent catastrophe and together we adjust the leg and save the day. I pat myself on the back for having been of use - aware that it was likely because I was in the flow.

So, what is the question?

The question is, do I really want to plant an apple tree?

Was that a magical alignment of events designed to prevent the collapse of the apple table or just an example of the Frequency Illusion, AKA. the Baader-Meinhof phenomena?

Does it matter?

Is everything connected?

I say, Yes! Because I choose to think YES, my life feels filled with magic, I am in a state of mindfulness and I am constantly seeing the interconnectedness of all things. Plus, don't kid yourself, there are medical benefits associated with a flowy style of thinking. But that is a topic for another day.

Something to chew on:

Did it occur to you that the employee that worked with me to prevent the incident, that they were the very employee that stacked the apples on the table and accidentally knocked the leg out of alignment? They could have been in big trouble had the collapse occurred. Quite possibly they were already in trouble, and were under scrutiny and were up to the their third strike and then they'd be out? Could that table collapse have been job-ending?

Did you think those thought? No? Why? I always consider the helpers role and what it means to prevent an unfortunate event or to save the day. I like to remind myself that it is not always the Tina Show. I am not the center of the universe and not everything is about me.


Note: Never assume that because a person believes in metaphysical phenomena that they are ignorant of disciplines like philosophy, science and psychology. The best path, in my extremely humble opinion, is to always remain curious. Today's science was yesterdays mysticism. Someday in the not-so-distant future, being in the flow will be easily explained to everyones satisfaction.

I am not the scientist or the philosopher or the psychologist, but I respect all those marvelous minds and seriously cool professions.


Sincerely, Tina Lupiezowiec



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